Monday, December 11, 2006
Christmas Miracles

So many Christmas happenings this last week.

First off I FINISHED my shopping,always a monumental moment. Santa was done months ago and I did a lot of it via the internet, then the extended family gifts and the always most important teacher's gifts and class presents(19 of the same thing for my son's class) and helping my Mom do her shopping. Mind you nothing is wrapped yet, but that's the easy part. Also the yearly Christmas Photo is signed ,sealed and mailed.It only took two days and about 75 shots but this time we actually got a lot of good ones and it was hard to choose. That in and of itself is a Christmas Miracle.

Also, this is the first time my differently abled son, has actually spontaneously ,unprompted and uncoerced said he wanted Santa to bring him something, as in " I want Santa to bring me a Trumpet" and you bet he will. For most parents they are inundated with their children wanting things and not being shy about voicing that and my daughter is no different. But my son has never really asked for anything holiday or birthday specific. Yes, he may ask for an Icee, or to go ride with the people(Escalator at the Mall) or go the the basketball gym(the YMCA).But this is the first time he seems to really get Santa and Christmas before the big day. He has always "gotten" the presents on Christmas morning. So another Christmas miracle for us.

Another recent joyous occasion was the acceptance of a referral of a daughter by an internet friend. I have never met her in person or even ever heard the sound of her voice. Yet through her blog and emails , we have connected on the adoption and awaiting parenthood level. I have followed, cheered, ached,cried and now rejoiced in her journey. Offering advice, which I am sure was hard to swallow at times, and Been there sentiments that I am sure she had trouble relating .When you are in the middle 0f your own journey, waiting for the call to travel, waiting to meet a referral and the heartbreak of having to refuse, you are sure that no one has ever gone through this before. No one could possibly understand.That your journey is harder, longer , more stressful and wrought with emotion than anyone's has ever been. One minute you are sure you will be the one in a million that will not work out, that you will return home empty hearted and destined never to be a Mom. And then in the literal blink of eye, all that changes. You see her, hold her ,feel her. Knowing in an instant that this is your daughter, the one you have waited an eternity for. The one you never lost faith in finding.Your tears are turned into laughter, your cracked heart is now beating full and strong and rapidly in love with this small person you have known for only minutes and loved for a lifetime.

Another Christmas miracle.

I am feeling very much in the Holiday Spirit this year in a non stressed and enjoying each moment kind of way.We have had a good year personally and professionally. My youngest started kindergarten and is thriving. My son is doing great , making good progress and is happy. My extended family is all still intact with no illness, deaths or other dire happenings. My sister got married and my niece started college and it is all she dreamed it would be.

It is easy to take all of this for granted and not stop and be Thankful for your blessings. I have found myself doing alot of that this past year. Maybe that added more to my restful spirit than I realize. It is such a simple thing, to take a second or two and send up a silent prayer of thanks for the small seemingly inconsequential things.There is a difference between being grateful and giving thanks and this year I have learned to differentiate between them. Giving Thanks is incredibly more satisfying to the soul.

I know my web friend is so grateful that her adoption journey has had a joyous finale.

I am Thankful that a beautfiul daughter has found her Mommy and Daddy.

I am endlessly Thankful for my two children and my husband.

Adoption and parenthood is filled with the lowest of lows and the highest of highs. It is hard to see the top of the mountain when you are down in the valley. Learning to be thankful for the ride up and down is the key.

As I bake Christmas cookies, enjoy our annual viewing of "Christmas Vacation" , wonder where I will put all the stuff they got after Christmas and start to think 3 weeks out of school for the holidays is a little much, I hope I remember to send up a little Thanks for each of those moments.

And if I can manage to still fit in those jeans in the New Year, that will be another Christmas miracle .


Post a Comment

<< Home